We all now know that a few days ago, I asked y’all to vote for me, y’all showed up like Republicans to a gun show, and I wound up winning a $50 gift card.
What did you win?
Well, you won the right to choose what I have to do to reimburse you for your vote.
I’d like to lay out a few ground rules though.
The first rule is this:
After January 1st, I’m going on a diet for 6 weeks, and I can’t eat anything. None of you suggested anything like that, so it’s all good. And yeah, I’ll tell you all about the diet later.
I WON’T DO ANYTHING NAKED. Geez, people. I have limits, and there isn’t enough pixelation in the world to cover up the stuff on me you don’t want to see.
I won’t do anything illegal. Seriously? Run down main street with a target on my butt? Geez. What is it with you people?
With all that being said, I will give you the suggestions that were given to me that follow those guidelines, plus a few of my own that I have thrown in. Y’all have to vote on it, and if you want to rig the vote by sending your followers over here to vote for your choice, by all means, go ahead. Just post in the comments the one you vote for. One of the suggestions was “do something with bacon.” So if you want me to do whatever you vote for with bacon, just add a “with bacon” to the end of your vote.
1. Wear a dress and make a vlog while wearing a dress. (I will perform a musical number.)
2. Get in a potato sack and hop across town.
3. Do a “polar bear” dive into the local lake in nothing but a pair of skivvies.
4. Dress up like Lindsay Lohan and say something to my adoring fans, in my best LL voice.
5. Make a Birthday Sex video.
6. Make a “Just because my pickle talks doesn’t make me an idiot” video.
7. Make a video on how I plan to become mayor of Okay.
8. Make a video explaining how I’d use Erin’s dad’s Japanese toilets.
10. Ed and Moog’s pick.
I’m sorry Lee, but I can’t think of anyone who would loan me a cow to wrestle, otherwise that one would be up there. For sure, I’d wind up accidentally killing a cow by suplexing it, and then where would I be? I’m pretty sure that’s a “if I break I buy it” type thing.
There you have it. Let the voting begin!
Since neither Ed nor Moog made suggestions, I went ahead and made them the 10th choice, which just means that they can collaborate on something for me to do, and then announce it. As long as it follows the rules, I will do it.
You can only vote once, but like I said, you can invite your friends over to vote as well. Heck, that’d be cool, because I might have a chance at breaking 50 comments for the first time ever!
Voting ends at midnight central time.